DEATH BECOMES HER

I will freely admit to a little voyeuristic curiosity when it comes to obituaries. Obviously treating obituaries with respect is my paramount concern, but it is always interesting to read how families choose to remember their loved ones.

However, every once in a while an obituary comes along with a detail so peculiar, coming precipitously close to being a complete non-sequitur, that it makes me ask myself, “The family wants to include that in the obituary?”

Consider the following passage from an obituary I recently received:

Her birth was performed by a midwife in a hotel, reportedly because the doctor was high on drugs at the time.

I’m sure this is a story that became part of the family mythology, related to friends and relatives who, in turn, told their friends and loved ones, and now the family has committed it to print to be shared by countless strangers thanks to the newspaper and the internet.

Besides being one of the more colorful anecdotes I’ve seen in a long time, the story also prompted a rather lively discussion concerning whether or not the statement could be libelous. The consensus was that this was unlikely: the deceased was born in 1929 in North Dakota; neither the doctor nor the midwife were named; so the possibility of some descendent of the doctor coming forward and accusing us or the family of libel was remote, to say the least.

Now I’m wondering if we’re going to start seeing more of these unique personal anecdotes in obituaries. Can I anticipate reading about someone’s alcoholic aunt or unreliable father? A cheating spouse or teacher who got a little too friendly one afternoon? I suppose the possibilities are endless as long as they’re not obscene or break any libel laws.